| Copyright © 2006-2009 Anointed Word Ministries All rights reserved. Used by permission. |
| Article Copyright © 2009 Nan C Loyd All rights reserved. Used by permission. |
| MARRIAGE MYTH #5 IT'S THE WOMAN'S JOB TO CLEAN THE HOUSE |
Is it the woman's job to clean the house? The answer to that is yes... and no. It depends on the
circumstances.
I remember well in the early 1970’s when women’s lib was a fanatical chase for equal rights, burning
bras, and a lot of anger and male-bashing. I had a friend who went to one of the first N.OW. meeting
when the group was just forming in our area. There were lots of angry women telling her that her job
as a secretary was demeaning and she should strive to better herself. They recommended she go
back to school so she could be the boss, not a simple underling. Huh.
I remember thinking, “So, if I like what I’m doing but because I’m not the boss, this group is saying I’m
demeaning myself. Am I not just exchanging a man telling me what to do for a woman telling me what
to do?” I decided right then and there, no one was going to be allowed to tell me that what I was doing
made me less than OK.
So I ran into this attitude again when I opted to come home and raise our son. In other words, I
became a **horrors** housewife. Man, the thoughts that run through a person’s head when they hear
the word “housewife” – I guarantee one of them is “dummy.” Ask me how I know – been on both ends
of it! It is like the minute I exchanged careers, I lost my viability. I was no longer a functioning person
in society. And guess what? A lot of women’s groups fostered that thought. It is as if, since a person
makes the choice to stay home and raise healthy, well adjusted children, they are somehow lacking in
life.
OK OK – I know you’re asking yourself “what does this have to do with housework?” Patience!
The Bible (God) says in Titus 2:4-5 says that a woman's function is to "...teach the young women to be
sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good,
obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed." The Greek translation for
keepers at home literally means "housekeeper." So God set the chain of command up where the man
provides for and protects his family while the woman maintains the home by keeping it clean, orderly
and functioning smoothly. She is the one who cooks, vacuums, washes the dishes, irons the clothes,
and polishes the furniture, to create a warm, inviting sanctuary.
But, if the lifestyle you desire as a couple requires a joint income, you must both make the necessary
adjustments to accommodate that choice. That means the husband should realize that because his
wife is now helping him to fulfill his responsibility to provide, he must now help his wife to fulfill her
responsibility to care for the home.
If you are both working, one spouse shouldn't come home, kick off the shoes, grab a frosty soda, and
sit down in front of the television shouting, "What's for dinner?" And need I say that the question "Why
is this house so messy?" can lead to a frosty soda being poured over the head? One of you should
be folding laundry while the other cooks!
God's set order for the division of labor is a principle that doesn't change. If you both agree to make
some adjustments and changes to God’s order because of the lifestyle you want, then you have to
share the responsibilities that go with those changes. God isn’t against wives working outside the
home. He gives wives the opportunity for a better lifestyle, one with less stress on all family members,
but the choice is always the couples.
If the choice is for the wife to stay at home, then scale down the lifestyle to fit that choice. There are
less expensive homes and cars. At the same time, a husband can't be so prideful that he won't allow
his wife to work, yet there is not enough money to buy enough groceries and clothes!
So yes and no, depending on the scenario!
circumstances.
I remember well in the early 1970’s when women’s lib was a fanatical chase for equal rights, burning
bras, and a lot of anger and male-bashing. I had a friend who went to one of the first N.OW. meeting
when the group was just forming in our area. There were lots of angry women telling her that her job
as a secretary was demeaning and she should strive to better herself. They recommended she go
back to school so she could be the boss, not a simple underling. Huh.
I remember thinking, “So, if I like what I’m doing but because I’m not the boss, this group is saying I’m
demeaning myself. Am I not just exchanging a man telling me what to do for a woman telling me what
to do?” I decided right then and there, no one was going to be allowed to tell me that what I was doing
made me less than OK.
So I ran into this attitude again when I opted to come home and raise our son. In other words, I
became a **horrors** housewife. Man, the thoughts that run through a person’s head when they hear
the word “housewife” – I guarantee one of them is “dummy.” Ask me how I know – been on both ends
of it! It is like the minute I exchanged careers, I lost my viability. I was no longer a functioning person
in society. And guess what? A lot of women’s groups fostered that thought. It is as if, since a person
makes the choice to stay home and raise healthy, well adjusted children, they are somehow lacking in
life.
OK OK – I know you’re asking yourself “what does this have to do with housework?” Patience!
The Bible (God) says in Titus 2:4-5 says that a woman's function is to "...teach the young women to be
sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good,
obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed." The Greek translation for
keepers at home literally means "housekeeper." So God set the chain of command up where the man
provides for and protects his family while the woman maintains the home by keeping it clean, orderly
and functioning smoothly. She is the one who cooks, vacuums, washes the dishes, irons the clothes,
and polishes the furniture, to create a warm, inviting sanctuary.
But, if the lifestyle you desire as a couple requires a joint income, you must both make the necessary
adjustments to accommodate that choice. That means the husband should realize that because his
wife is now helping him to fulfill his responsibility to provide, he must now help his wife to fulfill her
responsibility to care for the home.
If you are both working, one spouse shouldn't come home, kick off the shoes, grab a frosty soda, and
sit down in front of the television shouting, "What's for dinner?" And need I say that the question "Why
is this house so messy?" can lead to a frosty soda being poured over the head? One of you should
be folding laundry while the other cooks!
God's set order for the division of labor is a principle that doesn't change. If you both agree to make
some adjustments and changes to God’s order because of the lifestyle you want, then you have to
share the responsibilities that go with those changes. God isn’t against wives working outside the
home. He gives wives the opportunity for a better lifestyle, one with less stress on all family members,
but the choice is always the couples.
If the choice is for the wife to stay at home, then scale down the lifestyle to fit that choice. There are
less expensive homes and cars. At the same time, a husband can't be so prideful that he won't allow
his wife to work, yet there is not enough money to buy enough groceries and clothes!
So yes and no, depending on the scenario!