Baby Bear goes downstairs, sits in his small chair at the table. He looks into his small bowl.
It is empty. 'Who's been eating my porridge?' he squeaks.

Daddy Bear arrives at the big table and sits in his big chair. He looks into his big bowl and
it is also empty. 'Who's been eating my porridge?!?' he roars.

Mummy Bear puts her head through the serving hatch from the kitchen and says, "Let me
explain for you.. It was Mummy Bear who got up first. It was Mummy Bear who woke
everyone in the house. It was Mummy Bear who made the coffee. It was Mummy Bear who
swept the floor in the kitchen.  It was Mummy Bear who went out in the cold early morning
air to fetch the newspaper and croissants. It was Mummy Bear who set the table. It was
Mummy Bear who walked the dog, cleaned the cat's litter tray, gave them their food and
refilled their water.

'And now that you've decided to drag your sorry bear-rearends downstairs and grace
Mummy Bear with your grumpy presence, listen carefully because I'm only going to say
this once....

I HAVEN'T MADE THE PORRIDGE YET!!!!"
THE THREE BEARS
A far more accurate account of
the events of that fateful morning