- The garage is all yours.
- Wedding plans take care of themselves.
- Her wedding dress: $5000; his tux rental $100.
- Chocolate is just another snack.
- Car mechanics tell you the truth.
- You don't care if someone notices your new haircut.
- Same work ... more pay.
- Wrinkles add character.
- The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
- New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
- Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
- A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
- You can open all your own jars.
- Dry cleaners and hair stylists don't rob you blind.
- You can leave the motel bed unmade.
- You can kill your own food.
- You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
- Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
- If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.
- Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
- You don't have to clean your apartment if the maid is coming.
- You can quietly watch a game with a buddy for hours without thinking: "He must be mad at me."
- You don't mooch off other people’s desserts.
- You can drop by to see a friend without having to bring a little gift.
- You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
- You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
- The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
- You don't have to shave below your neck.
- Your belly usually hides your big hips.
- One wallet and one pair of shoes, one colour, all seasons.
- You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives, on December 24th, in 45 minutes.
